Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize