I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize