Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
