I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
