In the future we'll all be gay
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
God, I missed his penis.
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