Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
