Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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