remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
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