I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
