I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
