no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Randomize
