: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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