My brain says no but my pants say off.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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