From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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