She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize
