i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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