i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Randomize
