We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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