fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
