My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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