I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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