you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
