I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
