So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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