ya dads aren't the best wingmen
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
