What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
