that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
COCAINE IS GR8
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Randomize