Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
