what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize