so explain again why im purple
no
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
