I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
