Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
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