He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
