Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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