I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Randomize
