You work out of a Hotel?
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I have tasted many bathrooms
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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