Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
