Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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