Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Holy sore nipples Batman
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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