i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
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