So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
