People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
