Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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