No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
operation have a gay friend backfired
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
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