Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Randomize
