god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
