He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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