Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
