wake up i wanna do it froggy style
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
