I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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