Kareoke will never be a sober sport
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
